The Anniversary

March 10th marked the the 18 year anniversary of the death of Pat's family.  On this day, Pat lost his father, mother, great grandmother, older brother, and younger brother to carbon monoxide poisoning.  Pat himself was physically marked by the carbon monoxide and the coma that followed and his life was forever changed.  Pat asked me to post a description of what we did to commemorate the day and then he will do a post to talk about his thoughts of the day.

We started the day with a pleasant surprise for Pat, I decided to take the day off from work to be with him. Pat and I woke up early and picked up his Grandma C (His mom's mom) at 7am for breakfast at the Egg and I.  Pat had a steak and egg omelet, Grandma had chicken fried steak, and I had a spinach and mushroom omelet.  Pat ate all of his breakfast and about half of mine, in fact he tried to coerce me into trading with him but I was only willing to share, not switch.  While we ate, we quizzed Grandma about some family memories and she told us some really nice things about his family.  The best thing was when she told us why she named Pat's mom Maria Erlinda.  Apparently there was a woman in the hospital at the same time as Grandma C whose little girl was stillborn.  Since Grandma hadn't named Linda yet, she agreed to name her baby Maria Erlinda after the other woman's little girl so that she would be able to find some comfort that there was a little girl out there with her daughter's name.  I thought that was such a sweet thing to do.  Grandma C said that Linda was the only child she named, Grandpa C named all of the rest of the children when they were born.

Then we picked up Reed and went to Walmart to do a little shopping.  We spent quite some time picking out new shoes for Pat. Hard to believe, but he has worn through his second pair of shoes.  I didn't realize how bad they really were until we saw the new and the old side by side.  We also picked up a bunch of pink carnations and some peach carnations.

Once we had put our groceries in the car, Pat and I took the carnations and slipped one into the handle of the doors of as many cars as we could in the parking lot.  It took us about an hour and I think we covered about 75 cars.  We were able to hand deliver a few, and after people got over the shock of a complete stranger giving them flowers, we could tell they were touched by our attempts to brighten their day.

We also got to see Pat's Aunt Lily in the parking lot.  We spent some time catching up with her and Pat gave her several flowers.  She surprised Pat by giving him a hug and a kiss at the end of the conversation, I don't think she has ever done that before.

Then we headed back to our house and loaded Buster and Hershey into the car.  We took them to the dog park in Evans and let them run around to their heart's delight for a few hours.  It was a beautiful sunny day with just a light breeze to keep things cool.  Hershey and Buster had a great time and it was really funny to see Reed trying to play fetch with Hershey (who is great and fetching and retrieving indoors but outside just catches it and drops it where it is).

After that we decided to head to Golden Corral after dropping the dogs off at home again.  The food was delicious and we all ate until we were sick.  It was really funny to realize that Reed and I both had the three same favorite foods.  Guess it does run in families after all.  We had Pat remember some of his favorite and saddest memories of each family member he lost.  It was so great to have him realize that he had given each member of his family and hug and told them he loved them at some point during their last day together.

After we waddled back to the car moaning and groaning about how full we were, we were able to sit in the car and rest for a bit.  In fact, Pat and I both took a nap.  We really needed it after getting up so early and staying up so late the night before. 

Then we went into the house to try some scrapbooking.  I could tell that Pat just wasn't in the mood for it because he kept finding excuses to wander away from it and then come back to it again.  We talked to my mom for a while and then went to bed.  Pat loves my mom almost like she was his own, just thinking of her makes him feel better, so I was glad that he got the chance to talk to her.

The only regret that I have for the day is that I let the day get so full.  I had really wanted Pat to have some quiet time to sit and think but it was clear that he wanted exactly the opposite so I didn't force it.  I think the highlight of the day was hearing Pat talk about how much he enjoyed the flowers during the last few weeks.   I am so glad that we had the opportunity to bless someone else's life instead of dwelling on his losses.